This will be my place to say everything I would say to you. Or is it, rather, to me?
I simply want to move on from this patternized set of thoughts, actions and reactions that birth swells of emotions and feelings. Some of which I cannot yet conquer and I must submit to, staying inside the pain and feeling every aspect of it haunting my life. I wonder, out of paranoia, am I even really here or have I exited this plane to flow through timeless wrenching fears? It appears to me that a part of my heart still beats that lies interconnected with yours. And this is so entirely disturbing, it burns to keep the rhythm when for so long you’ve been away. I lived in denial far too many days, in every single way. This vulnerability I am so stuck with, it dismantles me upon the bay
I look out sparingly, I’m looking in today.